According to wikipedia, the Stockholm syndrome is a psychological response sometimes seen in abducted hostages, in which the hostage shows signs of loyalty to the hostage-taker, regardless of the danger or risk in which they have been placed.
I really had no idea what it meant or that the term even existed until I listened to a song tonight. I think for some christians I may sound like a rebel sometimes in the sense that I usually don’t participate in their “culture”. I have a big problem with christians that point at other people as sinners and condemn them for what they do. Why? Because we are no better. For me christianity is not about I’m right and the non-christians are wrong, it is about we all mess up and are unable to clean it up by our own strength.
I sin, constantly, more than I would like to actually and I know that I’m not alone in this. The fact that I’m writing about it in itself shows me how I have changed. I have taken off my mask on this aspect. I have been a christian for around 14 years now and was actively involved in Church, which has helped me see a wide variety of situations. I still remember when a wise counselor told me: “Activity does not equal spirituality”. She was right, the fact that I went to church more than my brother who was a heroin addict doesn’t make me that much better than him. I did not know that then. I still remember taking my brother to countless rehabs (around 30 in total) and giving him “the speech”. “Why don’t you just stop, make a decision and stick to it, you can be stronger than that…”. Anyway, without really knowing I was putting him down because he was “in sin” and me up because I was “the christian”. Was he any different than the pastor that cheated on his wife with a lady that danced in the worship services? Was the pastor who is being accused of molesting children any better? Am I with my struggles any different? No.
Theologically I believe many things, but in the heart of it, God is love. The Bible even says that I can be, and do and accomplish many things but if I don’t have love I am crap basically. You don’t have to agree with my theology and I don’t have to agree with yours but you know something? Since the God that I believe in is love I am trying to love people more and that will pretty much be my message.
The clearest example of Christians not loving is seen everyday and is one that more than anything has hurt the Church. This is the battle against homosexuals. At some point, Christians forgot that their motive was love and their actions started being motivated by what a few believed. They became part of the Stockholm Syndrome, since a few started condemning gay people, that became the norm. Since some started saying: “We are right, they are wrong, we are good, they are bad, God loves us, God doesn’t love them”, that sadly became the message. They forgot which team they were a part of. My opinion is that God loves us, black or white, gay or straight, skinny or fat. Anyway, I think most people could agree with me in saying that we are not as good as we could be, but being bad, doing things wrong and living a crazy life does not change the fact that God loves us with an unwavering passion.
I guess all those years as a Christian have been helpful to open my eyes to this. I believe that we need to know God more, and in my life what has shown me his love have been the moments when I mess up so bad that I have no idea how to come back to him. All those years in church were great, but they did not show me what my struggles showed me. Don’t get me wrong I learned and still learn at and love the Church. But my perspective in many things has changed, I guess I’ve grown.
With that said, please listen to this song by Derek Webb, it’s goes along with this topic and was the inspiration behind me writing it…
Lyrics:
You say you always treat people like you like to be
I guess you love being hated for your sexuality
You love when people put words in your mouth
‘Bout what you believe, make you sound like a freak
‘Cause if you really believe what you say you believe
You wouldn’t be so damn reckless with the words you speak
Wouldn’t silently conceal when the liars speak
Denyin’ all the dyin’ of the remedy
Tell me, brother, what matters more to you?
Tell me, sister, what matters more to you?
If I can tell what’s in your heart by what comes out of your mouth
Then it sure looks to me like being straight is all it’s about
It looks like being hated for all the wrong things
Like chasin’ the wind while the pendulum swings
‘Cause we can talk and debate until we’re blue in the face
About the language and tradition that he’s comin’ to save
Meanwhile we sit just like we don’t give a shit
About the 3,000 people who are dyin’ today
Tell me, brother, what matters more to you?
Tell me, sister, what matters more to you?
Hi Rand,
Nice blog! It’s comforting to see that you are tolerant in your views – Christians in your part of the world are not famous for this trait!
Now for an atheist’s POV:
The bible, like any piece of literature, is infinitely interpretable. This means that schism within Christianity is inevitable and, in fact, has long been reality. The CoE is crumbling due to a collision between conservative and liberal factions (the gay issue being at the forefront).
I watch this ensuing war with amusement. The bible is quite explicit when it comes to homosexuals:
“You shall not lie with a male as with a woman. It is an abomination.”
It is the conservatives who have the easy argument. They can quote the bible verbatim while their liberal opponents must look for the possibility of metaphoric meaning within the bibles verses. And ultimately the more liberal Christians reduce the entire book to metaphor: Adam and Eve, Nimrod, Sampson and other unbelievable stories in the bible are reduced to figurative parables.
“So because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of My mouth.” Revelation 3:16. This is how I feel about liberal Christians – they have forsaken the text on which their “faith” is based. Why pursue such a practice? Why not instead rely on atheistic tracts from the likes of Thomas Paine and Voltaire who reject the theory of a monopolizing god and embrace humanity and such things as equal rights for homosexuals?
Thanks for having me in Dallas – I had a great time.
Regards,
Brian