TBNTag Archive -

My Music and My Christianity

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A few days ago I posted an iTunes link to Facebook from one singer whose music I enjoy. This singer is not a Christian.

Not too long after that I receive a message from someone basically saying this:

I can’t believe that you promote people like that who are gay and  drug addicts, etc. That does not go along God’s hand… Or does that mean that you don’t follow him anymore? I mean, everyone has their preferences and I don’t judge anyone, I am just surprised by this coming from the Christian guy I used to know. Take care.

Where do I start? Let me start with this, I used to be just like that. I used to believe that Christians should stick to Christian music, that music other than Christian music cannot edify you. Now? I don’t exactly believe that. By having that mindset I believe I was placing God in a box, a tiny little box and allowing him to speak to my life only through music made by Christians.

Let’s be clear, there is a good group of Christian singers and bands that are talented and whose music I follow, but there are a lot that, well, I don’t think put enough effort or talent into it. It takes more than lyrics about God to make good music, the fact that you are Christian does not necessarily make you a great musician. It takes time, effort, talent, creativity and being open enough to get rid of the cheesiness that has plagued Christian music for so long. I believe some are doing it, sadly, the majority isn’t.

On the other hand, I believe God can speak to us whichever way he desires to.  I believe that if for some reason, God’s followers are prevented from singing his praises, even the rocks will cry out. Be it persecution or lack of effort and commitment from the ones that should be singing. I really don’t mean to blast Christians with this post, I just think we need to be a little more open minded and allow God to speak to us anyway he wants to. Personally, I have been blessed by God through lyrics of songs written by drug addicts and people whose lifestyles I do not condone.

I know that most of my musical preferences are not appreciated by some Christians. For example I am a fan of the craziness that is Lady GaGa, I like her music, her showmanship and her boldness to be different, to step outside of the boundaries and try her best to be great. I love creativity and that is something that I can see clearly in her and believe it or not I think it is a gift of God.

In some ways I can identify more with broken people, people who don’t have all the answers or are always in victory. It’s hard for me to identify with people that are always acting like everything is just perfect, I don’t buy it because I know it is not like that. I used to be like that, I used to live behind a Christian mask that showed others that now, since I have Jesus, my life is perfect. So, in some way I can see through that and feel sorry for people who live trying to show others what Christianity really isn’t. Christianity for me is so much more than that, why would we need faith if everything was perfect? Christianity for me is that no matter how broken, rejected, lost I am, Jesus loves me and wants to heal, restore and help me find the way.

I know this is coming away from my main topic, which was music, but the same and even worse can be said about films. As someone who in the future would like to work in movies I simply cannot stand some of the movies made my Christians, good intentions do not make good movies. I watched “One Night with the King” and I know it’s loved by many Christians but I just find it… Let’s just say that I didn’t like it at all, the movie or the King showing his hard nipples all throughout the hour and a half that the movie lasted. Ugh.

So, yes I listen to good music, music that I like and enjoy. If you are a Christian musician don’t settle for just praising God, be awesome at it, practice, try your best to be the best. Don’t be afraid to bring songs out of your brokenness because it is those songs that will be instruments to touch the lives of others. 

I love God, and struggle everyday trying to follow him, but yes I still follow him. My life has been so changed since I decided to know him more that I just can’t do something else than following him. I have a hard time with some Christians though, I do not have to conform to your beliefs or live like you do. I did that and, for me, it didn’t work. It brought me a lot of distress and pain to live showing others the greatness of the Christian life when my life was so messed up inside. I would preach and then go back to my place of suffering, just to come out showing my mask and letting everyone see that it was all “OK”. Now, some years after that part of my life, even though I still have struggles and difficulties I don’t mind opening my life up to others and saying: “Yes, I am a mess“. I will not preach you a perfect, “TBN”, idyllic, utopic, warm and fuzzy life. I just can’t. But I can share what I am, a broken person, who even in pain and suffering was reached by a God who cares and, who I believe, loves awesome music. :)

I am a wreck.

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I stumble and fall a lot, and even through all my years “knowing” the Truth I am still susceptible to lies. I still struggle trying to live the way I know I’m supposed to live. The great thing is that after the darkest hour, the dawn starts shining in the horizon letting us know, there’s one more day, one more chance.

This song expresses some of the things I often feel. Through my years as a christian, I have come to the realization that I am a wreck, basically a disaster. That’s what makes God so good, that even though I am a wreck, he still showers me with his love. I have seen so many people with their act together, in public, when I know that in private, their life is a mess. I just got tired of it, tired of performing like a good christian, one whose life is all that and a bit more. To all those nicely dressed, TBN Christians: Sorry, I don’t fit your perfection mold, I think I never will. I prefer living everyday knowing that my heart needs Jesus a bit more, than thinking I’ve conquered everything and I am a king. I prefer to be a servant at the feet of the teacher than a prince at his right hand.

I am a wreck and that’s what makes me need my Savior so much more.

Stained Glass Masquerade
Casting Crowns

Is there anyone that fails
Is there anyone that falls
Am I the only one in church today feelin’ so small

Cause when I take a look around
Everybody seems so strong
I know they’ll soon discover
That I don’t belong

So I tuck it all away, like everything’s okay
If I make them all believe it, maybe I’ll believe it too
So with a painted grin, I play the part again
So everyone will see me the way that I see them

Are we happy plastic people
Under shiny plastic steeples
With walls around our weakness
And smiles to hide our pain
But if the invitation’s open
To every heart that has been broken
Maybe then we close the curtain
On our stained glass masquerade

Is there anyone who’s been there
Are there any hands to raise
Am I the only one who’s traded
In the altar for a stage

The performance is convincing
And we know every line by heart
Only when no one is watching
Can we really fall apart

But would it set me free
If I dared to let you see
The truth behind the person
That you imagine me to be

Would your arms be open
Or would you walk away
Would the love of Jesus
Be enough to make you stay

Well if the invitation’s open
To every heart that has been broken
Maybe then we close the curtain
On our stained glass masquerade

Is there anyone that fails
Is there anyone that falls
Am I the only one in church today feelin’ so small


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